Monday, October 06, 2014

Someday never comes

It’s late in the third quarter of my life, and it’s finally dawned on me that someday is today.

Someday is a catchall word used flippantly. It’s a time you won’t find on any calendar. “Yes, we’ll go to Paris someday.” Or maybe, “I’m going back to school to finish my degree someday.” But when is someday?

Jilda and I watched a movie this week, and a line in it stung me like a yellow jacket.

Tom Cruise starred in the movie “Knight and Day” with Cameron Diaz. The character played by Diaz said, “I always thought I’d drive dad’s GTO to Cape Horn someday.”

The character played by Cruise reflected for a moment before saying, “Someday is a dangerous word.”

Diaz looked confused, and then Cruise said, “That’s a code word for never.”

I’m not sure how a line in a movie by fictional characters could affect me in such a deep and profound way, but it did. I guess I realized the truth of those words.

Through the years, I’ve done a good job documenting my goals, hopes and dreams. It’s easy to look back to see what I wanted to do 25 years ago. I can also look through my journals and read where we went and what we did. The gaps between what I wanted and what I did are sizable.

That’s not to say that we didn’t do many enjoyable things. We’ve traveled, visited, performed and did meaningful things, but there were so many we scheduled for someday.

Many times the delay was because we fooled ourselves into thinking we didn’t have the money to do something or go somewhere. But if the transmission failed in one of our cars, or the fridge went on the fritz, we found the money to replace them. So why couldn’t we find the money to go to Paris?

Part of living is making choices, and looking around our home as I type these words, I see the things we chose.

The deep sense of satisfaction we get in knowing that our home is paid for is worth a great deal. There were times we thought we needed a bigger house in town, but thankfully we put those plans off until someday.

These last few years since I retired have been educational.

Health has always been a priority with us, so that’s why it was such a shock when Jilda began having issues with infection.

She’s now receiving monthly treatments to keep her immune system at a level so it can fight off lung infections. The side effects of these treatments can be brutal.

I said that to say this: We’re removing someday from our vocabulary.

We can’t afford to squander time, and neither can you ... even if you’re 20 years old.

In the broad expanse of time, we are on this earth for less than the blink of an eye.

If you want to do something someday, I suggest you get out your planner, find a date that works, write it down and then make it happen. Forget about someday.

19 comments:

  1. I love this Rick, it's so true... I finally made a plan to save for Disney world to take both my daughters in 3 years ... Someday wasn't happening, I had to make a plan like you said.

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  2. Haha... I use the word "one day" instead of "someday". But I guess you are right. We should remove this vocabulary and make this happening in real life! :)

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  3. Life is full of choices and we have the power to choose and we tend to choose our priorities first. The rest like you say never comes.

    One thing I've noticed as I mature is that even when I've realized my dreams there's always another one to realize.

    Now I've shifted my thinking a bit and I ask myself what does God have planned for me today and I've discovered that it has nothing to do with me but what I can do for others. This usually brings on a lot of satisfaction because the law of Karma works very well. It takes a life of its own. I feel like I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to do and I'm where I'm supposed to be at the moment. If something more exciting comes along tomorrow, then it's where i'm supposed to be.

    I also am working on changing what I should do and think instead of what I could do.

    Sorry, Rick, I'm so long winded.

    Have a nice day,
    JB

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  4. When I was married I thought someday was real. X knew it was imaginary. He has someday with my successor. I have NOW with Willy Dunne Wooters.

    Love,
    Janie

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  5. Very profound post my friend! I couldn't have said it any better. When Rich was preparing himself mentally for his passing, he said he was content with how his life turned out and that he lived a good life. He was 64. I didn't get MY someday's with him! We do need to "Just Do It" and that is how I try to live life now!

    Really, really loved this post! Thanks for reminding me! XX

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  6. So true. I tell kids not to rush so they can do things that need to be done.
    Once you start the true nature of life with family and a job, it all changes.
    You become enslaved by bills, taxes mortgage, kids......
    Later with knee and hip problems and other things.
    Once you have kids the joy and blessings lie in them and someday is a word that does not exist anymore. Just enjoy what you do have.

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  7. Excellent post! So true.

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  8. If I had subscribed to the "someday" philosophy instead of the "just do it", I wouldn't have done half of this: http://fishducky.blogspot.com/2013/12/i-hope-i-had-good-time.html

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  9. Oh so true and even more true when applied to a man mowing the lawn or fixing stuff or really a man doing anything around the house, it is always I will do it someday and of course us women would grow old and die waiting so we do it ourselves............just saying

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  10. True enough. My parents often talked about living in "next year country"

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  11. I am humbled by all you kind words. Apparently this one struck a chord with a lot of people who read the column in the newspaper too, because people have stopped me all day, saying how true it was for them.
    I'm not sure there is any better compliment for a writer.

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  12. You strike a chord my friend. I said that then look up and you just said it, but I will leave it because you did. I have wondered if some fiction writer ever done to others what Hemmingway did to me a couple times. there are times I think those writers are "Inspired".
    Anyway your take and words on this are just as revealing for me. good stuff. THANKS

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  13. What a powerful share, Rick. For the last few weeks we've been debating whether to spend the $$$ and my remaining vacation days to take a much anticipated excursion next month -- or conserve. I'm thinking your post just tipped my scales!

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  14. This is a great post and I can see why it's touched so many folks. I love the line of that movie..it really hit me too when I read this. I have my lists of things to do and by George I'm going to do them...thanks Rick!

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  15. I love that you write down your goals, hopes and dreams. I love that you didn't get the bigger house in town. I love this post! Very though provoking.

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  16. wow wonderful and interesting post.

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  17. Very good and thought provoking post. I have found in my later years that for too long I lived in the past, and not in the moment. :)

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  18. Very true, and something I have had on my mind lately..wishing to do this or that and ending up not doing it. Missed fun, missed adventures.

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  19. I agree with you totally! My husband and I have been travelling a lot since we retired. We went to Europe several times before retiring, and those were wonderful experiences we shared. We love traveling, seeing new places, meeting new people. I believe in today because life taught me long ago, when I was much younger, someday may never happen. Enjoy life now!

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