Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Let it Go

I have a condition that I rarely discuss with others yet here I am about to tell the world. I'm fairly sure it's not terminal but I think it's serious enough to seek the help of a professional. You see, I'm a junk-a-holic. I have my closet so crammed with stuff that it often spills out into the bedroom. I don't have dust under my bed because there's no room. I don't really have an attic, just a little space where the air conditioning man can crawl up there and service the vents. The last time he came to service the vents, he couldn't start for 30 minutes because I had to remove stuff that I had stuck up there and forgotten about.
We have magazines that are older than my niece who got her driver's license last month. Someone might advise what you need is one of those out buildings....got one. It should be condemned along with the old house on the back of the property and the barn.
It wouldn't be so bad, but I think I infected my wife too because she has lipstick with mold growing on it in the back of her make-up drawer. I'm actually afraid to look in the bottom of our refrigerator.
I really believe we need a junk-dectimy. I'm thinking about hiring someone to come into our home the next time we go on vacation and tell them to be brutal. Truth be told someone could discard half the stuff in our house and we'd never know.
How do you find yourself in this condition? It develops slowly. "I think I'm going to keep this Good Housekeeping because it has some great recipe's." Or maybe, "honey, I'm going keep this used inkjet cartridge because I'm going to buy one of those refill kits and save us a bunch of money." The next thing you know you have to turn sideways just to squeeze by the stacks of old newspapers that are waiting to get hauled off to the recycle bin.
We have a friend that abides by the philosophy that if you aren't currently using it and can replace it with little effort then trash it and buy a new one if the need arises. Her house looks like it came right out of Southern Living. But I know for a fact that she has never experienced the satisfaction of losing a bolt off the lawn mower and walking down to the barn and looking through an old bucket of nuts, bolts and screws and finding exactly the bolt you need. I know, I know...that doesn't justify sacrificing ALL the space on your property.
This weekend, I plan to clean out the shed.....I'm going to be brutal....I am......I mean it. Does anyone need a pair of used post-hole digger handles?

1 comment:

  1. I read somewhere that the way to get rid of things is to put them in a box, seal it and date it, then put it away. If you haven't opened the box in a year, give the box - unopened - to charity. I haven't quite got the hang of it yet, so let me know if it works for you.

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