Wednesday, June 26, 2013

As the elephant danced among the chickens

I went to war today. I tried to avoid it by being Mr. Nice Guy, but my happy-go-lucky attitude got me nowhere.
Our house has been invaded by gnats. I'm not sure where they came from, how they got inside our house, or why they are here, but you can't set a glass of tea (much less a glass of wine) down without a half dozen diving in and taking a swim in your drink.
Jilda has set out bowls of vinegar (a remedy her mom used), we made sure the counters were clear of fruit, veggies, or other things enticing to the critters, but their numbers seem to be expanding exponentially.
So I resorted to the old analog method of pest removal -- a fly swatter. I've smacked down hundreds of the little buzzing critters. It's like playing badminton with a really small evasive birdie.
There's something disturbingly satisfying about hearing the little ticking sound of a flyswatter moving at
warp speed smacking a gnat.
I found myself singing the words to an old Freddy Mercury tune (Queen) Another one Bites the Dust.
I'm a live and let live kind of guy until you get in my face and then it's like the old saying:  "It's every man for himself and God help the rest,"  said the elephant as he danced among the chickens.


  1. Love that song. Can see the futile elimination of gnats. We get fruit flies that don't want to stop.

  2. I'm a live and let live kind of girl too... sometimes though you have to take a stand.... I hate gnats:-(

  3. lol you made me laugh. We have small flies that fly around in circles. They make no noise but drive you batty watching them go round and round. Only the fly spray will kill them and then the other thing I really hate are the fruit flies.
    They bite and you can't kill them with anything.Very hard to get rid of but eventually I do. I like to leave fruit on the table but when I think of the fruit flies I think again They are better off in the fridge till it's time to eat them.
    So the day is over and time for bed.
    You and Jilda have pleasant dreams.

  4. LOL! Oh those pesky gnats. Makes a person wonder how something so tiny can be such an annoyance.
    BTW - I've heard vanilla is a gnat repellant.

  5. lol, too funny. Yeah sometimes you got to take them out now and let God sort them out later :). Hope you win the war.

  6. I bought a bag of potting soil to repot some house plants and shortly after I had gnats in the house.
    At least, gnats are not as annoying as those big blue flies that buzz and fly so irrationally that it's almost impossible to hit them with the fly swatter.

    Have a nice weekend

  7. Hahaha...I can just picture you swatting away with that song playing in the background. Those gnats can be a real pain in the patootie!

  8. Ants were our pests for a bit...seem to be under control for now, or else they're on vacation! Mosquitoes are miserable so far this year. I hope you gnats take a hike soon and you can get back to doing other things than "swatting"!

  9. Rick swatting away like crazy with the fly that mental image haha.

  10. How annoying. I've seen other remedies, too, but of course I can't remember any of them.


  11. Hahaha. Rick, this post made me laugh out loud. I look like a crazy person in front of this computer.Hilarious.

  12. Thanks all. I now have tennis elbow from swatting at gnats :)


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